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Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Assassination Attempt Against Michael Moore Fails

Posted by The Evil Emperor Mindstation @ 6/21/2005 07:43:00 PM

Democrats are furious today, accusing Republicans of an assassination attempt on controversial filmmaker Michael Moore. They allege that silencing Moore is a critical component of a comprehensive strategy designed to ensure the continuing dominance of the Republican party. Part of this strategy is to stop production of Moore's devastating new documentary Fahrenheit 9/11?.

Democrats allege that Republican '527' dollars funded this enormous pie
Republican spokesman Danny Baird loudly denied the charges. "How were we supposed to know that a man of Michael Moore's stature would be irresistibly attracted to the world's largest pizza? How were we supposed to know that he would eat himself half to death? There was just no way we could have known."

Moore, whose controversial films have made him a frequent target of right wing attack dogs, was last seen stumbling away in a stupor from the Iowa Falls-Alden High School parking lot, where, on Saturday, the world's largest pizza was constructed. His whereabouts remain unknown.

This image of Michael Moore is believed to be the last photo taken before his disappearance.

Baird continued: "I'm sure he will probably turn up sooner or later. This is probably no different than his three day rampage through the Little Debbie factory in Collegedale, Tennessee last May. He's probably sleeping it off in a dumpster somewhere."

Democrats are promising to hold a fake hearing in the congressional basement to investigate further.

- The Evil Emperor Mindstation, P.Z.I.C.

Linked on Outside the Beltway and Mudville Gazette.


Comments are open and unmoderated.
Abusive, hateful or irresponsible comments were probably posted by one of the contributors.
At 6/21/2005 12:25:00 PM, Blogger mensabarbie ...
{{{{`O`}}}} That is hysterical! HAHAHAHAHA! Good one!
At 6/21/2005 02:04:00 PM, Blogger The Conservative UAW Guy ...
Very funny.
Too bad they didn't finish him off.
At 6/21/2005 02:17:00 PM, Blogger Dr. Phat Tony ...
Back to the drawing board guys. Now how bout a 1 ton hotdog....

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