Arrived In Washington D.C.

(To follow the Emperor's trip from the beginning, click here.)



Monday Evening

This will be a short post due to my exhaustion after having lived through the ordeal of a non-aerial crossing of the United States. It is a error in judgment that I will not be repeating.

Despite the numerous inconveniences that troubled me during my roadtrip to D.C. we have finally arrived unharmed and intact (with the notable exception of Prof. Hawking, and the seventeen passengers who had to be dealt with along the way.)

The "Imperial Suite" was a bit less impressive than advertised.

My relief was soon turned to anger when I realized I had only booked one hotel room. How could I be expected to know that a single room would not be large enough to accommodate my personal staff? The single rooms at my palace are big enough to hold 25 people.

Well, we will make due.



I have posted my personal guard outside my door to repel any intruders. If you are in the D.C. area, and wish to bring a gift to my room, please note that my guards will not be wearing the uniforms I specially made for them, as they, in their usual insolence, have refused to wear them. One even having the gall to comment that his specially designed new uniform made him look like "a dick."

Do they realize how long I spent in night classes? How many hours I spent furtively sneaking into their quarters to measure their exact sizes while they slept? Or how many days and nights without sleep I spent at the sewing machine assembling their uniforms?

I will be hiring new guards once I get back to The Palace.


-The Evil Emperor Mindstation, P.Z.I.C.





UPDATE:

Several impudent readers have commented that it is impossible to travel from California to Washington D.C. in less than twelve hours, on a bus, making stops every fifteen minutes.

They fail to appreciate the force of the Imperial Will when commanding the impudent driver to take a short-cut.


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