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Friday, April 08, 2005

California's Prop 71 Starts to Yield Benefits

Posted by a4g @ 4/08/2005 07:32:00 AM

The controversial California stem cell proposition 71 in last year's election has already started to show promising results. Advantna, a genetic research biotech firm, has announced the first in what promise to be a long line of advances springing from the 10 year, $3 billion dollar promotion of research and technology approved by over 7 million Californians.

"Cell-abration is a great tasting breakfast cereal made of 20% real stem cells," says Brad Lundford, spokesman for Advantna. "We all enjoyed the South Park episode where Chris Reeve sucked the juice out of aborted fetuses. We all kind of looked at each other and said it at once -- cereal!"

The company describes the tiny heart-shaped cereal pieces as crunchy and satisfying, with a slightly earthy, meaty flavor that is only off-putting the first few times it is eaten. "We've adjusted the sugar coating to where it tastes just right," says Bjorn Alreedee, "like a mincemeat, or lamb with mint jelly."

Responding to the company's critics, Lundford says, "Ghoulish? Were the Japanese doctors doing medical experiments on POW's during WWII 'ghoulish'? Was Dr. Mengele 'ghoulish'? Were the Stalinists 'ghouls'? Where does it end? Just think of the science they gave us. Has the religious right in this country suddenly made everything they don't agree with 'ghoulish', so that you can't even conduct medical experiments on unwilling human subjects? There's a word for that kind of anti-intellectual theocracy: Ghoulish."


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