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Thursday, April 28, 2005

Al Gore teams with move-on.org in offensive against right-wing satire

Posted by a4g @ 4/28/2005 09:09:00 AM

There's a dangerous movement afoot in this country, and I'm not going to take it sitting down. So I sat down at my computer to take a stand, while seated.

In an outrageous attempt to crush right-wing political speech, move-on.org sponsored a speech yesterday by former Vice President Al Gore. The rally, ostensibly covering the topic of "judicial filibusters", was actually a wooden stake targeted at the vampiric heart of satire and mockery from the right wing blogs.

Using his incredible position of power, and phrases of supreme idiocy like "this aggressive new strain of right-wing religious zealotry is actually a throwback to the intolerance that led to the creation of America in the first place," Gore is attempting to sledgehammer every blogger on the internet that tries to carefully craft satirical pieces.

Like Hillary attempting to go to the right of the GOP on immigration, Gore is cynically trying to out-satire his satirists.

My attempts to mock him have come up completely dry. I've heard that Iowahawk had to throw away a promising 10,000 word piece that he'd been working on for days, and Scott Ott won't answer his phone. It just rings and rings and rings and rings. We love you Scott! Hold on! There is always hope!

Well, Mr. Gore, this means war. You may have out-rediculoused me this time, but I'm waiting, watching, googling. One day you'll say something slightly less stupid and incoherent than the speech you gave yesterday, and I'll still be here. Ready to misquote you and put words in your mouth that make you look like a fool.


UPDATE: I've been reading through some of Gore's speeches, and I realize now I am up against a more formidible opponent than I first realized. This guy has obviously been waging this fight against mockery and satire much longer than I realized. Still, it takes only one error for the master to be skewered by the pupil. I am a patient man.

You will trip up. You will say something coherent and rational. And then you will be MINE.


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